#xe's so. !!!!!!!!! it's such a fun thing to think about. like obviously not but also yes. like how much of it was arasaka

[ruvviks]

BABY, WE COULD REACH THE HEAVENS // OR DANCE IN HELLFIRE ↳ kaida uses xe/any pronouns

taglist (opt in/out): @shellibisshe, @florbelles, @ncytiri, @hibernationsuit, @stars-of-the-heart, @vvanessaives, @katsigian, @radioactiveshitstorm, @estevnys, @adelaidedrubman, @celticwoman, @rindemption, @carlosoliveiraa, @noirapocalypto, @dickytwister, @dameaylin, @killerspinal, @euryalex, @ri-a-rose, @velocitic

[mothmanssweetsucculentass]

Jason The Toymaker Headcanons

The grind never stops fr fr. Sorry for disappearing I had summer classes and then a certain triangle demon from a kid’s show is took up most of my attention and creativity, and now I’m in regular classes and silly goofy video games have taken up my attention and creativity when I’m not slaving over my art projects for school. Teehee. Oops!

Jason has been another underrated character in this fandom imo, and I especially love love love LOVE characters who just get so obsessed with shit. I can’t remember if it was canon or fanon about him, but I love the fact he gets so possessive of his friends to the point where he kills the competition. And also the friend. Because the best friend to have is one you have complete control over, right?

Anyways.

Cis man? WRONG.

Like you’re gonna look at Jason and tell me that motherfucker has only ever used he/him pronouns? Bro is an eccentric Toymaker ffs

Jason uses any pronouns. Even the ones that don’t exist. Bro collects that shit like Pokemon cards

Hey remember LJ? Yeah Jason made him

I mean hello??? Sentient toy clown? That’s right up Jason’s alley

Jason has also made other clown characters, like Candy Pop

Jason is also one of the few inhabitants that straight up doesn’t need to eat food. Ever

Much like Nina, no one’s really sure what he is, they just know its immortal like everyone else and insanely hard to kill

Most people also avoid them or go out of their way to not get emotionally close to him for super obvious reasons

Like. They’ve all seen her workshop. Every week he comes back with a new human he’s lied to and whisked off their feet with some bullshit fantasy and within the next few days they’ve made a doll of the poor guy

Jason technically isn’t even allowed to do that, humans aren’t allowed to know of the existence of the manor or Slenderman or literally anything that goes on there, but does Jason care? Absolutely not

Slenderman tried getting on her ass about it once, and by some miracle Jason was able to talk themselves out of punishment

Besides making morbid people dolls, Jason of course also makes random other toys. Almost all of them are sentient or are able to think and comprehend speech

Jason uses Mr. Glutton (the snake) as not only a chair, but a garbage disposal as well. Need to get rid of body parts? Give to the snake. It’s like a black hole in there

So y’know how Anne and Eyeless Jack are the go-to doctors of the residency? Jason is the fix it guy for anything that’s not biological

Torn clothing? Jason can sew it up for ya

Gun/chainsaw/mechanical weapon is jammed? Jason has a fix for it

Broken trinket from your room? Jason somehow has already made an exact copy of it for this specific occasion

You could count on one hand the things Jason doesn’t know how to fix

And still despite being the repairperson no one usually sticks around long enough to chat

You’d think with how delusionally clingy this mf is that it would be a problem but surprisingly no

There’s a reason why xe specifically only targets humans

Like? Humans as a species are so easy to manipulate? And are leagues more fun to torture and scare than her fellow serial killer roommates

Similarly to how the others make bets on what weird item Helen can use as a murder weapon, they also make bets on how fast Jason’s next victim gets dollified

So far the record is a single day because somehow one girl had the balls to pull an 80s horror protagonist and stabbed Jason with their own fabric shears

She didn’t get far. Obviously. What’d you expect from an entire mansion crawling with murderous entities. LJ accidentally clotheslined the girl while reaching between doorways for something

Everyone on the third floor then got to bear witness to Jason dragging her back to his workshop by her ankles. Using the same fabric shears. The carpet is still stained from how much she bled. I’m pretty sure one of her fingernails is still lodged in the wall, too

While they don’t share a studio/workshop, Jason and Helen often use a lot of the same crafting materials. They have a mutual relationship where if one of them goes out, they return with something both of them ran out of recently

Beyond that they literally never speak to each other, and they both like it that way

Jason is way too eccentric for Helen to be able to stomach for longer than an hour, and Helen is too particular with so many different things that it gets on Jason’s nerves

One of the few people that does stick around Jason often is Ann

Obviously there’s the underlying factor that Ann literally owes her current life to Jason, but even outside of that stipulation, Ann finds them pleasant to hang around

Unlike Jason’s other doll experiments and creations, Ann is the only one that came with sentience already attached. Saved Jason the hassle of having to create an entire consciousness network from scratch

Like damn, vengeance is one hell of a powerful force, enough so that once Ann was put back together by Jason, she was up and functioning practically immediately

The two aren’t inseparable per se, and definitely don’t see each other as anything more than friends (Ann moreso than Jason), but you can often find them in the same room interacting

Jason, like many of the others, adore Sally to an unnerving degree. It seems as if everyone, no matter how much they dislike kids or ghosts or humans or whatever else Sally counts as, feels a supernaturally strong urge to protect the kid. Jason is one of the few seen with her constantly

Yeah go figure the Toymaker likes to appease the child

But seriously it’s a little freaky how Sally has this effect on so many people. Someone should look into that

While it’s one of the most recent additions to the household, Jason is one of the oldest entities within the group.

Like hello bro was around in the late 1800s, Jason has peepaw bragging rights

With that comes the stipulation that Jason hates modern technology. The newest thing they own is a sewing machine from the 70s

I think it’s pretty obvious that because of his peepaw status, + the fact Jason thrives off unhealthy obsessive friendships, a lot of the younger residents hate her, and vice versa

Is friends/close with: Sally, Ann, Nina, and LJ

Is neutral about: Jane, EJ, Kagekao, Helen, and Slenderman

Doesn’t get along with/hates: BEN/Ben, Jeff, Clockwork, Puppeteer, Liu, Masky, and Hoody

Ben is practically the antithesis of Jason. Modern tech manipulator vs old fashioned old timey manipulator

If those two somehow end up in the same room it’s ON SIGHT

Nina and Jason are constantly bitching and gossiping about anything and everything under the sun. Somehow someone who’s besties with Jason’s rival is also besties with Jason. Nina is just that talented, apparently

Ofc they also bond over fashion. Who do you think makes most of Nina’s batshit insane wardrobe pieces?

Puppeteer annoys the hell out of Jason. That, and he keeps trying to steal and manipulate all the dolls Jason makes. Rude.

Jason is the only one allowed to destroy xer own work. If it catches you fucking with any of the dolls, thrown away or otherwise, you can kiss your existence goodbye because Jason will make it her life’s mission to see to it you never have peace again

Tries not to be in their true/corrupted form too often considering how rotted his arms get in that state. The skin flakes off and everything, and it’s really inconvenient when you’re trying to work on fine craftsmanship and your own rotten black flesh keeps falling into your paint or some shit

Not exactly the easiest thing to control though. The more emotionally volatile Jason is, the more likely you’re gonna see him at his worst

[nyehilismwriting]

do you have a favorite character to write?

I love all my children equally😇

BUT t b h it's whoever I've been writing most recently/most indepth!

writing Nash comes very easy to me - I don't often have to stop and really think about their characterisation, particularly their conversations with the operative, and that's a dynamic I never get tired of writing.

rohan is always always fun. xe can be a bit tougher to characterise than nash, since xe has a lot more.....layers, but I love xem and thinking about xir reactions to stuff is always a good time, even (especially) when xe's being....irrational, or kind of a dick.

leanna is also a joy to write, she's a nice break from the intensity and, tbh, bullshit of the first two. she's very straightforward and very refreshing, and I like writing a character who is more mature and knows what she wants and what she's looking for in a scene.

ki-ha is my specialest little man and I love him- he's great fun to write, and he has a lot of context to him that you guys aren't aware of yet, which makes him super fun to drop hints about👀 he is also, like leanna, one of the more straightforward characters, and I find his dynamic with the operative really satisfying.

rhaxa and imxa are just FUN! I love exploring the nonhuman axis there, with different body language and different experiences and how those colour their interactions with the op. you all haven't met imxa yet, but she's just kind of a dick, which is a thing I (obviously) enjoy writing, while rhaxa has a very different perspective from characters I usually write.

so, yeah! no favourite just my arms full of little dudes<3

[murruspins]

Welcome to my blog!

Hello!! Welcome to murruspins :3!

This is a special interest blog, however it also kind of acts like a diary. I write down what I’m thinking or hyperfixating on, same goes with my regular interests! This blog will also have alot of alterhuman content, as it’s a big part of my identity!

About the owner of this blog…

My name is Murruyu! I’m a transfem enby, and would prefer if you used they/it/xe on me aswell as fem + neutral terms! If you don’t respect my pronouns, I’ll simply block you, no biggie! 🤍

My special interests are mcyt (hermitcraft & life series specifically), horror, metal music and bio! When I say bio and horror, I mean all aspects. I love horror games, movies, shows, etc. And I love all biology paths/subtypes! (Eg: wildlife bio, botany, palaeontology, and more!)

I’m the host of a minor bodied DID system, however I won’t get into that much on this blog, as this is my personal blog! However, I will talk about our physical disabilities because they impact my everyday life, and this is a diary blog after all! [I will mainly talk about my EDS and CFS]

As I said before.. I am an alterhuman! More specifically, here is a link to all my kintypes!

This list may be updated/edited in the future, but for now, these are all of my (known) kintypes! Some stronger than others. More specifically, I have a super strong connection to the feline clade, more so than my other kintypes. Obviously, due to being alterhuman, I do not identify as human. I instead identify as my kintypes, I may post about my alter-humanity frequently 🫶

I am ALWAYS looking for moots/friends!! Click here to see my interests + adult mutuals are okay, just no dms!

DNI/BYI

DNI:

• People who hate on ANY of my special interests. No offence, but you’re not welcome here, this is my safe space! [PS: being afraid of horror or animals is not the same as hating on them, if you have a phobia of something that’s completely fine! Just don’t insult my spintrest on my page 🤍]

• Anti alterhuman, Anti Age regression, Anti pet regression

• Endogenic systems, Profic/Proship/Darkship/anything that fits into that category.

• FURBY BLOGS!!!!! Furby centred blogs/Blogs with furbys as their theme/pfp dni. Moots r okay but please add a warning whenever you post them 😭🫶. I’m terrified of those little things.

BYI:

• I’m autistic, I need tonetags! If you’re going to ask anything, I’d appreciate you using tonetags so I can understand you better! :3

• Adults may not ask to be my friends, No offence, just for boundary and comfort reasons, I am a minor after all. Mutuals are fine!

• I generally do not engage in discourse, if that’s something you’d like to know before following! This blog is focused on being diary, alterhuman and interest themed!!

• This is my main blog! If I’m active, it’s probably here. But my side blogs are…

> @liostims , my stim blog

> @lovesicksyndicate , our sys blog

> @faunafeature , my animal info dump blog

… Please keep in mind many of these blogs may be inactive, as this is my main!

MOOT SPECIFIC:

• I would appreciate if you tag your posts to do with war, guns & etc to do with tw war or war. I grew up in a situation that causes these to be big triggers for me. Thank you 🫶

• If you post dead animal imagery PLEASE add a tw or cut off or SOMETHING. I know this is specific but I’ve had a moot do this before and it was actually insane. I admit I’m a bit sensitive but I still don’t want to see that

Finishing up/Extras…

. . . Emoji games!

How these games work; ask via the ask option, and write an emoji + any other info you’d like, and I’ll answer! Just a small game for fun!

🐾 , info dump about a random animal I’m fixating on at the time! (Please include if you don’t want a specific animal due to a fear, for example: bugs).

🐈 , song of the day! ask and I’ll give you a song that’s been stuck in my mind recently, or just a random song off my playlist!

🐍 , daily check in! I’ll give you a small rant about my day so far, and tell you how I’ve been recently! (I’ll try to keep it positive.)

"(Therian/biology/metal/anything related to my blog) culture is…" asks are also always appreciated!! I love seeing them, and I love interacting with people!!

Blog tags . . . !!

#murru mews 🐾 | my general tag! Diary entries!

#murru hisses 🐍 | vent posts

#murru’s asks : replies to my asks!

#murru’s rants : rants!! Either in response to the emoji games, or just to infodump :]

#murru’s playlist : anything to do with music!

#murru’s toybox : anything to do with my collections!! I collect a lot of things, so this tag will be full of things in my collection :]

#murru’s games : an additional tag, just for my emoji games!

PS: blog creation date.. Jan 30th 2024!

Thank you for reading !

. . . Enjoy your travels, dear friend!

[thelittlefirepup]

💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

Alright, Introduction post.

You can call me L, Firewolf, Little spark, Little Prince, or Firepup/pup. (L and Firewolf for big me and the others for Little me.)

Pronouns: They/xem are default.

List:

They/xe/it?/fae/ei?/non

Rose/star/moon?/spark/void/dark/pup/wolf/player/code/wire/create/art/paint/flutter/glitch/error/chaos/prince/love/end

🌹/⭐️/🌙?/🔇*/🔥/🐉/👑*/🎵*/🎶/🦋*/🪞

*the sound of your ears ringing from silence*/ *the thrum of blood in your veins*?/ *the way nothingness feels tangible-or the awareness of the nothing*/ *the flicker of starlight*/*the hum of electricity*

Pronouns are grouped by type in order of:

General/neo

Nounself

Emoji

Xenopronouns (though you obviously can't use these for me, just wanted to put them out there)

Question marks are for the ones I'm unsure of. Colored ones (emojis are with asterisks*) are my favorite, and pink is for little me while blue is for big me (though big me is fine with and enjoys a combo of all of them). Yes, I know some of them collide with the names I said to call me, and I'm sorry. Luckily, their are multiple options, so you should be able to find a combo you like to use for me.

Gender list:

Main is nonbinary but here are some xenogenders I identify with:

Silencegender, Musicgender, Darkgender, Colorfluid, Dragongender, Stargender/other space genders, Wolfgender, Minecraftgender, Digigender (Codegender), Computergender/electricgender, Artgender, Poetgender, Stufferic (Stuffed animal gender(?), Oneirial, Dream/nightmare(?), Endgender, Starryxic, Butterflygender, Glitch, Lunoric, Fictionkinic?, Rose, Littlefluid

*if one of these was a label made by you, feel free to ask me to credit. I grabbed so many that I lost track of which went with who and who wanted what. Really sorry*

(Once again, question marks are for ones I'm unsure of)

I'm a pronoun/gender collector, so the list will constantly grow and change. If you find this weird or you don't like it, then sorry, but this probably isn't the blog for you.

I also think I may be fictionkin. I'm not 100% sure, but it would explain some things. If I am, my kins are Angel Dust and Roman Sanders. Hope no one is mad that I'm calling myself fictionkin even if I'm not sure. I'm also questioning deitykin.

I'm a regressor. I don't know my age range. If I had to guess, around 3-7, but I'm not sure. I also find it hard to fully regress, which makes finding an age even harder. (I might be just a dreamer, don't know).

But little me will be posting sometimes (flutter is already excited to talk about love's obsession with butterflies). Little me posts will be marked with 💖pink hearts (and maybe butterfly emojis), while big me will mark posts with 💜 purple hearts (like this one). Both will be used if we both work on a post. Ive started marking Otherkin posts with music notes.🎶

I'm hoping to keep this blog safe for littles. So in my posts or in your comments, or any asks, please mark as "not safe for littles" or use ❌️ an x, Or both to be safe, if a post about this blogs topics may not be safe for littles.

I might not post often since this is a side blog for me. My main one, I a.) Didn't feel comfortable putting this stuff as well as my usual posts there b.)didn't want to stretch my blog too thin and c.) The main one is that my other blog uses a username my family and friends know me for and I don't want them finding this stuff. So heads up.

And DNI if homophobic, transphobic, against any of the lgbtq+ including xenogenders, anti otherkin, racist, kink, nsfw, pro ed, sexist, abelist, and any kind of hateful.

You've been warned about what this blog contains, so don't get mad at me if you still choose to look at it. Just DNI and move on.

Otherwise, hope you are excited. Feel free to chat, interact, ask questions. I'm just here for a fun time.

Peace out <3

[trashbins-stuff]

Hello. I have seen that you have been tagged by @neobixiscool on one of their posts. I am planning to make a rant post on them. If you can provide some background info and your side of the story, that would be great. If you feel uncomfortable discussing this, that's ok. Have a good day/evening.

rub hands together like flies. my time has come/silly 😋😋

and thank you for coming to me :3 i appreciate it/gen also i get to go all cabby on this hehe

oh and, im not really hurt-hurted by them, i feel like mocha (mochablogger), liam (moonmxple) and mac (blairdrawzstuff) are most affected. They did have a book with my character in it but in a different universe or something (without my consent nor credit btw). Anyway under the cut is my observant. Honestly i think i might have jsut make the rant post for you lmao hrgbnhe 😭😭

the background/before:

mocha was working on a little story and xe said we could be in it! so obviously me and my friends signed up for the fun, not really expecting anything, the story was called "The Traumatized Cup", thats when we first meet him.

In one of the chapter mocha had introduced rubix, at first i didnt really think much about him, i was just aware of his presence, i do notice him and mocha started to become friends and i thought that was great :)

something that you should probably contact cuppy for more info:

so rubix (or according to rubix, "jasp" was roleplaying) and mocha were friends on facebook, and they roleplayed there i think, this i just know but apparently he said crap about liam (mocha's platonic partner and my best friend). Mocha is very sensitive and even in roleplay xe's still uncomfortable with what rubix said

"bezel's" divorce headcanon (and possible influence on further problems):

i heard people talked about it but never knew where it came from, but thne i found out and,,

tdlr; 1st one is about mocha and rubix, i dont know if mocha consent to it. 2nd one is uh a bit weird i i guess like he could have ask facemoji to make another one ;-;. 3rd ah yes the divorce that i had heard about!/vneg

rubix said bezel forced him into making the 1st one, even if thats true, rubix said the divorce was bezel's headcanon but hes the one that decided to post the 3rd one ("okay i asked facemoji again..")

seem kinda sus not gonna lie..but what do i nose right :-)

bezel probably influence more but even after all these months im still not sure if he really did do those things, idk lul, it is pretty weird that bezel's blog was a sideblog though (liam told me)

heres a bunch of words with link attach, those r my opinions lmao:

these u can just click to read so i hope thats okay

on wattpad he have a book in which he painted mocha, hazel and blair as manipulative (admittedly his writing was good, he could have used it for something different though)

he also uses some of our characters (such as mocha cuppy, hazel, blair, harp, blueberry, winter, bin (mine btw), seedling, galaxy journal,...etc) he did the delete that book tho, anyway heres more screenshot proof (credit @moonmxple )

mocha asked liam and neobix said its cringe

i remember this one also

the one where he tried to ban pet name and online dating (in 2023) (check the comment and other reblogs also theres alot, its practically a goldmine/silly)

and can i say he barely knows our friend group? like sure he knows mocha but hes trying to fit into our group (very poorly)

please read what cass wrote in the comment (thanks cass for speaking out about it ily)

the ask i sent him

NOT to get all bitchy here but mocha blocked you therefore you literally dont appear anywhere on xer dash, you're out of xer life and xe had no reason to pester you, not everything has to be about mocha. You guy's relationship (or supposedly lack there of) had change but honestly? thats okay they dont have to like the same people that they liked yesterday. You might think you know that's them but it wasnt, mocha in real life is kinder and better than the version inside of your head and they're happier now and its so sad that you cant see (because you're blocked)

and again, not everything has to be about YOU

he also made it all about HIM like excuse me ???? can i not complain for little bit without you coming in and nag about your problem ??? if you're suffering go talk to someone dont talk to online strangers ??? :)))???????

bro cant even read a long paragraph post like go back to elementary school lmao, also reporting ppl just because they use their right to not forgive you is such a sore loser move, it make you sound like petty six year old (also max be spitting facts tho)

bro brought out HIS right (reporting mocha, which he actually cant do if he doesnt have a valid reason) while ignore MOCHA's right (not forgiving him, which isnt a valid reason for him to report xem). The definition of petty is literally complain way too much about unimportant things that could have and should have ended already

"you dont have to relate to everything you see on the internet, somethings are simply not about you" :)

did you know that to report someone you have to click alot of buttons??

common salad W &lt;3333

oh yeah, this doesnt have links but jasp/neobix is being so casual abt bezel's death but also uses it as a way to make people feel bad for getting upset with what he did

Sorry for playing the dickhead role, but you wouldn't be laughing if you knew how we felt about every single one of you. (why it sound serious all the sudden lol)

why i still doubt (uh and heads up, galaxy brush, kodu, cuppy,..others who think @/rubixisanidi0t was saying the truth, im not saying he isnt but you cant blame me for not trusting can you? please skip this part if you're sensitive):

naw so if this was suppose to be jasp then whats jasp motive lmao :/..he dont gain anything from this + who tell people their secret plan publicly?? + how did jasp know about rubixs hallucination?? rubix please dont tell such personal things to jsut your friends and please just talk to an adult in real life. And jasp, dont let these kind of things on the internet its not safe/srs

this is just straight up weird and also why did neobix/jasp said "old friend" like hes rubix?? when he supposedly told rubix and i quote "yeah.. Soo.... This person named @/mochablogger seemed like some cool person, and when I tried to talk with them... Nothing happened, so when I figured they didn't care... It all happened at once." neobix/jasp and mocha werent even friend to begin with why was he SO obssess over getting mochas forgiveness when they supposedly barely interact much??

aint it a bit weird how this is supposedly jasp/neobix but why would they make this video??? it???doesnt make any sense?? and like were rubix and jasp still good friend??? why wood bezel make jasp of all people do it??? unless yk

HOL UP, WAIT A MINUTE..if rose jelly dated rubix but rubix tunred out to be jasp then..WHO IS ROSE JELLY ACTUALLY DATING??????

if @/neobixiscool is suppose to be jasp then how did he get a screenshot for a show rubix was making???

i translated it and head up. it has death threat in it

you know, if someone stole my account and ruin my reputation i wouldnt be following them and be mutuals with them :)

i appreciate him saying hell save us but like..why would @/neobixiscool linked the real rubix's yt and discord knowing full well that the real rubix was there and could told joiners the truth??? that seem kinda dumb ngl also on the channel you can find a video called "waitng for forgiveness" which @/neobixiscool had talked about. and lets do a bit of timing here, if rubix really was telling the truth and havent been on social media since his alst post on @/rubixcuix (last posted in august) and the divorce arc and the roleplay thing and EVERYTHING had started in september, and if the yt belonged to rubix, then he shouldnt have known that mocha didnt forgive him and make that video????? bc he wasnt suppose to be there since august??? bc if anything he shouldnt be waiting for forgiveness bc if jasp really did steal his tumblr account then its not his fault?? like i find it absoltuely HILARIOUS that the evidence agaisnt what rubix said was on both the account @/neobixiscool AND @/rubixisanidi0t's PINNED post?? and it boggles my mind how no one talks abt this???/lh/nm i mean its quite obvious maybe im jsut really observant though idk

if you got your account stolen and jasp supposedly brought back a wattpad book, i dont think you should be continuing it?? and didnt you said your reported him on wattpad?? on the same account where the book is?? why are you acting like "yes i did promise them this and im fully aware of what happen even though i supposedly havent been here since august and i will continue this book" has it hit you?

uh yeah so these are just my silly little takes, but hey! what do i nose? :-)

[piescornerstore]

Info Post!!!

Hey! I'm Pie. My main account is @digitsofpie, and here is where I like to post sketches, art, and other such things about Spamton/the Addisons from Deltarune.

I usually will be posting sketches here and there, but I don't mind getting asks and requests! Some things to keep in mind, though:

First and foremost, absolutely no nsfw. Maybe like some vague jokes, but beyond that, nothing.

Also, nothing "proship" or "problematic." I don't condone that kind of thing on my other accounts and I don't condone it here.

I see the Addisons (including Spamton) as coworkers and friends, so occasionally they'll be shipped. I don't mind other interpretations, and if my interpretation makes you uncomfortable, you totally don't have to interact with me. But don't come to me seeing them as both siblings and dating. That's... just gross and why the hell would anyone do that if you could be doing literally anything else.

And of course no bigotry or anything like that. If I see people interacting who obviously express their racism, transphobia, homophobia, ableism, etc. you can expect a hard block.

Anyway, moving on, you might notice I sometimes make art in conjunction with a fic I'm writing. You can find my works here.

I kind of treat the Addisons like my own ocs (aaaaand they kind of Are at this point), so here are some headcanons I have for them so you can get to know them! Note that I have given them their own unique names, but in posts I will usually use just their common names (Pink, Orange, etc.) since I've reserved them mostly for the fic.

Pink Addison

Baker-Miller (Millie), he/they/she

Millie is very proud and self-centered, and they are one of the most popular and successful Addisons in Cyber City. She often speaks for and voices most of the opinions for the group, and because she's rather intimidating, she's not used to being opposed.

They specialize in shoes, jewelry, other such accessories as well as romantic products.

Millie does not like Spamton. Not at all. He finds him to be annoying and a liability, like being seen with him would damage his image.

Blue Addison

Cerulean, they/them

Cerulean is a calm and reserved Addison, and is much less... antagonizing than their friends. They act as a voice of reason for the group.

They work at a shoe shop which is a second location of the one Millie works for. Millie got them this job, as their previous one failed.

Cer is really fond of Spamton, and while they don't seem to do much about how the others treat him, they still try to make him feel included.

Orange Addison

Ginger, he/she

Ginger is very hardworking, almost dangerously so. She's a bit oblivious as to what goes on in her interpersonal relationships, but is very well-meaning. He's sort of the group's dad friend.

Ginger, of course, is the prime clothing salesman in Cyber City. Unlike other Addisons, Ginger makes his clothing from scratch, other working late night after late night just to make sure he has enough stock. All the hard work really pays off, though.

Ginger finds Spamton funny. Both in a positive and negative way. That's really all there is to it.

Yellow Addison

Aureolin (Lin), she/xe

Lin is bombastic and vivacious. She's often too much for the group to handle, but it's not like she cares. She takes pride in it. Xe can be pretty rude but it's more of a front than anything.

Lin puts the ads in the paper, but xe aspires to start writing xer own articles someday. When she doesn't get an opportuniy, though, she's sure to complain about it at the grill.

Lin was the one to get Spamton its first internship sending emails to clients, and has a lot of fun teasing it whenever xe can.

Spamton!

he/it

Nobody really knows what he's supposed to be. He's like an Addison, but not quite. Like there's something missing. Or there's something more? But nobody really pays much attention to it outside of that, so it's not like anybody cares.

On Spamton's opinions on the others:

If you think Millie doesn't like Spamton, Spamton does NOT like Millie. He's mean to it every chance he gets, and sometimes Spamton feels like it even deserves it.

Cerulean is by far the person that Spamton adores the most. They're nice to him when they don't even have to be. He can tell he still probably hasn't done enough to earn their respect-- but it's not like he doesn't welcome it.

Ginger likes to treat Spamton like his own personal mannequin. Which, as long as Spamton gets some sort of money out of it, isn't really bothered by. Plus, Ginger seems to really understand his style.

Spamton is really thankful for the things Lin has done to help it, and although it gets pissed at the teasing from time to time, it liked whenever Lin let it ride on her motorcycle. But for some reason, he's only ever allowed to ride in the sidecar.

As for himself? Spamton doesn't really have anything positive to offer. He just hopes, that at some point, someone will come along to give him a reason to see himself as something bigger.

And you know the rest!

I enjoy the interest my things have gotten, and while this isn't really an ask blog, like I said before, I do enjoy asks and things, so don't be afraid to send something if you have an idea! I'm usually glad to build upon that. Thanks!

[jupitercl0uds]

hi! i'm ash

they/them/xe/xem • panromantic • asexual • non binary • autistic (with suspicions of having adhd) • english • atheist quaker • a tad bit silly

been on the tumbler since 2021 so i know my way around here but i dont get every little reference (i get most and for the ones i dont i just nod and smile along). i am still a teenager so some Classic Posts are older than me and most are from when i was in primary school.

i dont really have a sophisticated tagging system, but if it helps, spouting to the void is my text post tag. i dont even strictly use it for text posts tbf

blogs i run:

this one (obviously)

@blues-amazing-blog - oc blog (currently on hiatus)

@wswe-autism-fic - fanfic blog (for waluigi says 'wa' everyday until dekuyama is popular). i also treat this as an alt account for fandom stuff sometimes

@knuckles-with-a-keyboard - silly little blog where i pretend to be boom!knuckles (i really really love this blog its so fun)

@jupitercl0uds-art - my art blog (shock horror)

@nonbinary-sticks-the-badger - my sonic blog

external links (whoops forgot to add this)

maybe one day ill set up a linktree idk

ao3

letterboxd

twitter (i only use this for posting from my switch now)

spotify profile

email me - jupitercl0uds.burner@gmail.com

dm me on discord: jupitercl0uds

i think thats it

click this link for more external links including some of the above ones but specifically how to contact me if i cant use tumblr

interests:

omg i love so many things its not even funny. a few important ones are waluigi (special interest), sonic the hedgehog (special interest AND hyperfixation (omg please kill me)), art (like, as a general thing, but particularly visual) and you WILL find me randomly posting oh-so-passionately about something ive never even mentioned before.

i do animation and illustration but that's over on my art blog. also all my animations are WIPs. you probably won't find anything other than a few weird lip syncs from when i was like 11 (i got into animation because of gacha life and animation memes). most of my art is sonic atm lol.

i also read and write fanfic! my wattpad and ao3 is jupitercl0uds :D

wattpad is mostly old stuff, crack and occasional reposts of my ao3 stuff. ao3 is mostly whatever is on my mind at the moment and WSWE.

misc

occasionally i get all heated up about actually important stuff. that's usually sandwiched inbetween my regular goofy goober behaviour. for the basic gist of it: very left wing, the tories are cunts, vote green, free palestine. you also need to understand the weight of that sentence because i hate swearing.

i have other socials too but i dont really use them that much. got bored of twitter and i forget about all my other accounts. only ones i use now are whatsapp (lmao), tumblr and i guess ao3 and wattpad. theres no real point in linking something i havent used in months

anyway, have a nice day and please go to bed on time!

faves (non-exhaustive)

AUTISM BOY!!!! ANXIETY GUY!!!! MILES 'TAILS' PROWER!!!! he's been my favourite sonic character since i was little!!!! except for that brief period where it was amy because i found out tails was a boy and i, as a 7-year-old girl who had just learned about misoginy, decided amy was better because she was a girl. and that briefer period where it was cream because she had confetti in sonic dash.

my favourite iterations of him are scu tails, classic tails and sonic boom tails!!! i h/c him as autistic, having anxiety, low self-esteem but also being really cheerful and nonchalant about a lot of stuff. i enjoy trans tails of all kinds, but i believe in cis gnc tails.

NON-BINARY ICON!!!! TOP SURGERY GUY!!!! WALUIGI!!!! call me thomas jefferson cause i have an entire binder on this guy. waluigi is THE blorbo from my spin-off-party-shows. i got into him because 'hahahaha! it is the funny garlic man's funny rose partner!' and that became 'they could marry me and i'd say yes on the basis that we'd get to see each other everyday, even if i only love him as a friend.

im very passionately hateful about 'hot' waluigi. shut up. waluigi is perfect. i hope he can be canon one day <3 i h/c him as autistic, transmasc non binary and really into gothic lolita. i interpret their relationship with wario as romantic partners and waluigi being super super poor. also, wlw mlm solidarity with rosalina!!!!!

anti-faves

dr starline i love a bisexual icon as much as the next person but starline is not it. i want him to Suffer. which is why i then go on to make loads of fanart of him where he's crying over something. in the one shown above, i have just kicked him in the balls (full image). i also would love to be a VA for him because that'd really piss him off. good style tho. you go girl.

manjimutt (sorry but i only have 1 image of him)

hello to the other living yokai watch fan out there. i hate manjimutt. when i was younger i felt sorry for him, cause i was like 'oh, poor guy, always going to jail!!!' no. die. i do not like him. i hate manjimutt. i do like saying his name tho. MAnji-mutt! i think i hate him more than starline, because at least starline has redeeming qualities. the only redeeming qualities manjimutt has is pity because hes not actually committing crimes. thats it. hes not a nice person. hes just a guy. hit him with a wooden plank (har har).

that poor poor poodle though

posts i like

idk posts on my own blog i like a lot. idk if thisll be A Thing because im literally only doing tthis because of the first post on the list

recognising a url and the chaos that followed

stuff about my lgbtq+ identity idk

THIS IS HOW MUCH I KNOW ABOUT SONIC OK!!!!!

can you call me that slur?

[ponfarrtimeatthevulcannightclub]

Write a story about Quark going to a shop?

(you have no idea how hard I am resisting the urge to make you write about the Riddler)

Gonna see how much I can write in 10 min on mobile

It was a normal day on DS9 and everyone was bustling around doing whatever they do on a normal day. Everyone except for Quark, who wasn't even on ds9. And come to think of it, neither was Odo. They were on bajor because Quark had begged Sisko to go to get some new things for his bar earlier.

"Captain, Sisko, Benjamin." The sight was pathetic (and not the fun kind). Quark was on his knees, head down, and wrists pressed together in the traditional Ferengi way.

Sisko rolled his eyes at the dramatics of it all, and Quark was a bit afraid they'd get stuck back there. "Don't call me Benjamin. And get off the floor. Aren't you the one always talking about how expensive and rare those fabrics are."

"Right, uh, sorry about that, and yes, these are some of the highest quality fabrics on this side of the quadrant. But that's not the point. You have to see the quality of these cups. Aaand for the price they're selling them at?? It's like they don't even know how valuable they are. Also, I desperately need new glasses after Brunt tried to take my bar and, you know, the whole place being destroyed and me almost being murdered."

"Fine Quark, you can go." Quark visibly perked up," but I don't want you going alone. You haven't been to Bajor that often, and who knows what you'll get up to down on the surface. Sisko to Odo"

"Odo here"

"Quark wants to go down to Bajor to get some c u p s, and I want you to go with him to make sure he doesn't get into too much trouble"

"But sir, I have reports to go through, and what if something happens while I'm gone?"

"You can bring the reports on the runabout and we still have Kira and the security team. I'm sure we'll be fine. Besides, when's the last time you took a day off? Runabout one is in the docking bay and have fun in bajor. Sisko out"

--------------------- got to walls in 10 min but now I have to finish it so time to add another 10 got to the #after the next 10

Bajor was lively and all of the shops were colorful and bright with flowers and vines climbing the walls. Quark fit in well with his eccentric clothing and his giddiness just to be there. Meanwhile odo had an aura of annoyance around him which made everyone avoid the pair.

"Oh come on odo, lighten up. We're on bajor, your childhood home, kind of. Did you even live on this part of bajor?"

"Childhood home is a statement that only semi applies. For one I was floating in space for at least a few hundred years, and also aren't childhood homes supposed to be pleased places with fond memories? So I could hardly consider bajor a home and I didn't really have a childhood. Can we please just hurry up and find your cups?"

"Right yes the cups, glasses is you will. The seller said the shop is named Alvarez and xe described the shop as purple and blue with red accents around it if we couldn't find the name"

"Wait quark, what do you mean we?"

"Well obviously you were coming. Even before Sisko said something. I almost got murdered and you guys know I'd probably find something to get into while I'm down here. And since you know me better out of everyone on the station, sisko would choose you to come with me. Besides, i kind of wanted you to come."

"I'm sorry, can you repeat that last part? I couldn't quite hear you."

"Dang it odo, don't make me say it again."

"I'm most certainly making you say it again."

"Fine....I wanted you to come because I wanted to spend time with you."

"But...why? You don't even like me."

"What do you mean I don't even like you?? I'm at the same place at the bar every day as I have been for the past 7 years waiting for you to come in at the same time, on the dot, for 7 years. Why would I wait for you if I didn't like you?"

-------------

This is incomplete bc I have chem to finish but if you like it I'll finish it whenever I can. Maybe I'll even post it. Also sorry if the dialog is confusing.

[milkyway-writing]

It Could be Worse?

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Ship: Remus/Virgil/Janus (Could be read as romantic or platonic)

TWs: A mild NSFW joke involving Janus's name made by Remus

-

Janus knew she had gone too far. Knew that Roman hated being compared to his brother. That’s why she said it, in the heat of the moment. She had been vulnerable with her name and was immediately got made fun of, so she lashed out. Of course, that didn’t make it acceptable by any means. But that led her here, to Remus’s room.

Janus knocked on the door, knowing Remus was probably working on some project or another. She fiddled with her sleeve, anxiously running her fingers over the patch of scales on her arm.

There was clattering from inside the room until the door opened, Remus leaning precariously against the doorframe.

Janus could see past him into the room, where she saw Virgil sprawled out on the floor, idly looking over at them.

“So…? Whatcha need, Snakey?” Remus looked down at her, its head tilted curiously.

Janus paused, thinking over her choices, before nodding softly to herself. She would drop the lying for this, it was important enough. “I need to talk to you two, please. Something… not extraordinary happened, and I think it’s best if you hear an explanation of things from me before you hear it from Roman, because I fucked up majorly.” Remus seemed to pick up on the urgency and underlying upset in her voice, gently beckoning her into the room.

Virgil sat up, having been listening in to the conversation, sat up from the floor, pushing his headphones down around his neck.

“What’d you do? Can’t be that bad, can it?” Remus asked as Janus sat on the bed.

“Oh, it can be. I may or may not have compared Roman to you, called you the evil twin, and maybe possibly said that I wouldn’t be able to tell you two apart if you didn’t have a mustache. And I also tole Roman, Patton, and Thomas my name, which went about as well with your brother as stabbing someone with a plastic spoon.” Janus hissed the last bit, almost bitterly.

Virgil winced. “There have to be worse things that could happen."

Janus looked up at Virgil, a doubtful look on her face. “Like what?”

Virgil paused, obviously trying to think of an example. "Um. Something."

Remus hummed. “I have one, he could’ve mispronounced your name on purpose, on top of all that, J-anu-”

Janus hissed softly. “Okay first off, rude. Second off, don’t you dare continue that sentence.”

Virgil snorted softly. “Yeah, okay, that might be a bit worse.”

Janus sighed. “Yeah, but like… I fucked up. And I don’t think apologizing would fix it. I mean, I’m not exactly a ‘beacon of truth’, as Virgil puts it. And I haven’t done anything for him to trust me. I hurt him.”

Remus nodded. “Yeah, you messed up a lot. But, it’s not unfixable. Give him time, maybe let me talk to him some. Let him get the anger out of his system, then be honest. Apologize, and do things to fix shit. Stop using him to get your way. Leave him be, and let him decide if he wants to trust you or not. Worse comes to worst he decides not to, and you leave him alone.”

Janus pondered that for a moment before nodding. “...Alright. I’ll try that, I guess.”

Virgil tilted his head. “You can’t just try, Jan. You have to do it. You can’t just do it part way, or try to fake it. You have to want to do it, and make things better.”

“I do! I didn’t want to hurt him!” Janus huffed.

Virgil seemed unimpressed, raising his eyebrow. Xe seemed fully aware that Janus wasn’t telling the truth.

After a few moments of silence, Janus huffed again, a complaining tone apparent in her voice. “...Okay, I meant to hurt him, but I don’t want to hurt him further.”

Virgil nodded and softened, seemingly satisfied with that answer. “Okay, good. Then you need to work not to make the same mistakes, and if you mess up, own it.”

Janus looked mildly uncomfortable upon being told to own her mistakes but nodded anyways. “Okay. I can do that.”

Remus smiled a little. “Good, I’m glad. Now, wanna see what we were working on?”

Janus nodded, a small smile spreading across her face. “Yeah, I’d love to.”

[gendercensus]

On fae/faer pronouns and cultural appropriation

HOW IT STARTED

I had a handful, a very small handful but more than two, responses in the Gender Census feedback box telling me that fae/faer pronouns are appropriative. The reasons didn’t always agree, and the culture that was being appropriated wasn’t always the same, but here’s a selection of quotes:

“Fae pronouns are cultural appropriation and are harmful to use“ - UK, age 11-15

“I’m not a person who practices pagan holidays but, my understanding is that pronouns like fae/faeself are harmful because the fae are real to pagans and is like using Jesus/jesuself as pronouns“ - UK, age 11-15

“I know you've probably heard this a million times, so has everyone on the internet, but the ''mere existence''of the fae pronoun feels really uncomfortable for some of us. I'm personally not against neopronouns like xe/xim, er/em and the like, I am a pagan but apart from the, imo most important, reasoning of that pronoun being immensely disrespectful, I worry as an nb about people who banalize the usage of pronouns ''for fun'', and I'm quoting what some people have told me.“ - Spain, 16-20

“I don't agree with fae/deity pronouns just from a pagan perspective it's very disrespectful to the cultures they come from. Like Fae are a legit thing in many cultures and they hate with a fiery passion mortal humans calling themselves Fae to the point of harming/cursing the people who do it“ - USA, age 16-20

“only celtic people can use far/ faers otherwise it’s cultural appropriation, many celts have said this and told me this“ - USA, age 16-20

So that’s:

❓ Someone who doesn’t say whether they’re pagan or Celtic.

❌ Someone who definitely isn’t pagan.

✅ Someone who is pagan.

❓��Someone who doesn’t say whether they’re pagan or Celtic.

❓ Someone who doesn’t say whether they’re pagan or Celtic.

So, just to disclose some bias up-front, I am English so I’m not Celtic, but I do live in Wales so I am surrounded by Celts. The bit of Wales that I live in is so beautiful in such a way that when my French friend came to visit me she described it as féerique - like an enchanting, magical land, literally “fairylike” or thereabouts. Coincidentally I have also considered myself mostly pagan for over half of my life, and I can’t definitively claim whether or not the Fae are “part of paganism” because paganism is so diverse and pick’n’mix that it just doesn’t work that way.

To me the idea that fae/faer pronouns would be offensive or culturally appropriative sounds absurd. But also, I am powered by curiosity, and have been wrong enough times in my life that I wanted to approach this in a neutral way with an open mind. Perhaps what I find out can be helpful to some people.

So since we only have information from one person who is definitely directly affected by any cultural appropriation that may be happening, the first thing I wanted to do was get some information from ideally a large number of people who are in the cultures being appropriated, and see what they think.

~

WHAT I DID

First of all I put some polls up on Twitter and Mastodon. [Edit: Note that this post has been updated with results from closed polls.]

I specified that I wanted to hear from nonbinary Celts and pagans, just so that the voters would be familiar with fae/faer pronouns. I asked the questions in a neutral way, i.e. “How do you feel about...” with “good/neutral/bad” answer options, instead of something more leading like “Is this a load of rubbish?” or “are you super offended?” with “yes/no” options. I provided a “see results” option, so that the poll results wouldn’t be skewed as much by random people clicking any old answer to see the results. And I invited voters to express their opinions in replies.

Question #1: Nonbinary people of Celtic descent (Ireland, Scotland, Wales, Cornwall, the Isle of Man, and Brittany), how do you feel about non-Celtic people using the neopronoun set fae/faer? [ It's good / No strong feelings/other / It's bad ]

Question #2: Nonbinary pagans, how do you feel about non-pagans using the neopronoun set fae/faer? [ It's good / No strong feelings/other / It's bad ]

The Twitter polls got over 1,100 responses each, and the Mastodon polls got over 140 responses each. With a little bit of spreadsheetery I removed the “N/A” responses to reverse engineer the number of people voting for each option, combined those numbers, and recalculated percentages.

Obviously this approach is not in the least scientific, but thankfully the results were unambiguous enough and the samples were big enough that I feel comfortable drawing conclusions.

Celts on fae/faer pronouns being used by non-Celts (561 voters):

It's good - 42.5%

No strong feelings/other - 44.0%

It's bad - 13.5%

Pagans on fae/faer pronouns being used by non-pagans (468 voters):

It's good - 47.2%

No strong feelings/other - 39.5%

It's bad - 13.3%

Here’s how that looks as a graph:

The limitations of polls on these platforms means that we have no way to distinguish between people who have more complicated views (”other”) and people who have “no strong feelings”, so we can’t really draw conclusions there. If we stick to just the pure positive and pure negative:

Celts were over three times as likely to feel positive about non-Celts using fae/faer pronouns than they were to feel negative.

Pagans were over three and a half times as likely to feel positive about non-pagans using fae/faer pronouns than they were to feel negative.

So Celts and pagans are way more likely to feel actively good about someone’s fae/faer pronouns, even when that person is not a Celt/pagan. That’s some strong evidence against the idea that fae/faer pronouns are appropriative, right there.

~

CORRECTIONS

To be clear, I haven’t done any research about the roots of fae/faer or the origins of the Fae and related beings, but my goal here was to get a sense of what Celts and pagans think and feel, rather than what an historian or anthropologist would say.

On the anti side, here were the replies that suggested fae/faer either is or might be inappropriate:

“I only worry that not everyone understands the origin of the word outside of modernized ideas of fairies.“ - pagan

“As a vaguely spiritual Whatever (Ireland), I think a mortal using "fae" as a pronoun/to refer to themselves is asking for a malicious and inventive fairy curse (on them, their families and possibly anyone in their vicinity, going by the traditions). I have not heard of this term before, so this is an immediate reaction from no background bar my cultural knowledge of sidhe/fae/term as culturally appropriate. My general approach is people can identify themselves as they want.“ - Celtic

So we’ve got a pagan who’s wary that people who use fae/faer (and people in general) might not have a fully fleshed out idea of the Fae. And we’ve got a Celt who doesn’t mind people using fae/faer personally, but based on what they know of the Fae they wouldn’t be surprised if the Fae got mad about it. No outright opposition, but a little concern.

There were not a lot of replies on the pro side, but not because people weren’t into it, judging by the votes. There were a lot of “it’s more complicated than that” replies, many of which repeated others, so quotes won’t really work. Here’s a summary of the Celtic bits:

“Fae” is not a Celtic word, and Celts don’t use it. It is French, or Anglo-French.

“Fae” can refer to any number of stories/legends from a wide variety of cultures in Europe, not one cohesive concept.

There are many legends about fairy-like beings in Celtic mythologies, and there are many, many different names for them.

The Celts are not a monolith, they’re a broad selection of cultures with various languages and various mythologies.

And the pagan bits:

Paganism is not closed or exclusive in any way. It might actually be more open than anything else, as “pagan” is a sort of umbrella term for non-mainstream religions in some contexts. A closed culture would be a prerequisite for something to be considered “appropriated” from paganism.

From my own experience, pagans may or may not believe in the Fae, and within that group believers may or may not consider the Fae to be sacred and/or worthy of great respect. (I’ve certainly never met a pagan who worshipped the Fae, though I don’t doubt that some do.)

And then we get into the accusations. 🍿

“this issue wasn’t started by Celtic groups or by people who know much about Celtic fae. It was started primarily by anti-neopronoun exclusionist pagans on TikTok.“

“[I’m] literally Scottish [...] and it’s not appropriative in the least and honestly to suggest as such is massively invalidating towards actual acts of cultural appropriation and is therefore racist. Feel like if this was actually brought up it was either by some people who seriously got their wires crossed or people who are just concern trolling and trying to make fun of both neo-pronouns and of the concept of cultural appropriation and stir the pot in the process.“

“It wouldn't be the first time bigots falsly claim “it's appropriative from X marginalized group" to harass people they don't like, like they did with aspec people when they claimed "aspec" was stolen from autistic language (which was false, as many autistics said)“

“It's been a discussion in pagan circles recently ... People were very quick to use the discussion as an excuse to shit on nonbinary people.“

“I think it would be apropos to note that the word "faerie/fairy" has been a synonym for various queer identities for decades, too. The Radical Faeries are a good example.“ (So if anyone has the right to [re]claim it...)

A little healthy skepticism is often wise in online LGBTQ+ “discourse”, and some of these people are making some very strong claims, for which I’d love to see some evidence/sources/context. Some of it certainly sounds plausible.

~

HOW DID IT START?

I had a look on Twitter and the earliest claim I can find that fae/faer pronouns are cultural appropriation is from 18th February 2020, almost exactly one year ago today. Again, tweets are not the best medium for this, there was very little in the way of nuance or context. If anyone can find an older claim from Twitter or Tumblr or anywhere else online, please do send it my way.

I have no idea how to navigate TikTok because I’m a nonbinosaur. (I’m 34.) I did find some videos of teens and young adults apparently earnestly asserting that they were Celtic or pagan and the use of fae/faer pronouns was offensive, but the videos were very brief and provided nothing in the way of nuance or context. For example:

This one from October 2020 with 29k ❤️s, by someone who I assume is USian based on the word “mom”?

This one from December 2020, that says “I am pagan and i find it rather disrespectful. It’s like using god/godr or jesus/jesusr.” That’s probably what inspired the feedback box comment above that refers to hypothetical jesus/jesusr pronouns.

If anyone is able to find a particularly old or influential TikTok video about fae/faer pronouns being appropriative I’d really appreciate it, especially if it’s from a different age group or from not-the-USA, to give us a feel for how universal this is.

For context, fae pronouns were mentioned in the very first Gender Census back in May 2013, though you’ll have to take my word for it as the individual responses are not currently public. The word “fae” was mentioned in the pronoun question’s “other” textbox, and no other forms in the set were entered so we have no way of knowing for sure what that person’s full pronoun set actually is. This means the set may have been around for longer. The Nonbinary Wiki says that the pronoun set was created in October 2013, as “fae/vaer”, later than the first entry in the Gender Census, so I’ll be editing that wiki page later! If anyone has any examples of fae/faer pronouns in use before 2013 I would also be very interested to see that.

~

IN SUMMARY

Obviously I can’t speak for everyone, as the Twitter polls are not super scientific and they only surveyed a selection of Celts and pagans within a few degrees of separation of the Gender Census Twitter and Mastodon accounts, but I can certainly report on what I found.

For a more conclusive result, we’d need to take into account various demographics such as age, culture, location, religion, race/heritage, etc.

As far as I can tell based on fairly small samples of over 400 people per group, a minority of about 13% of Celtic and/or pagan people felt that use of fae/faer pronouns is appropriative.

A much higher number of people per group felt positive about people who are not Celts or pagans using fae/faer pronouns. The predominant view was:

It can’t be cultural appropriation from Celtic cultures because fairy-like beings are not unique to Celtic cultures and Celtic cultures don’t call them Fae.

It can’t be cultural appropriation from pagan cultures because paganism is not “closed” or exclusive in any way, it’s too broad and open.

~

If your experience of your gender(s) or lack thereof isn’t described or encompassed by the gender binary of “male OR female”, please do click here to take the Gender Census 2021 - it’s international and it closes no earlier than 10th March 2021!

[morsobaby]

moi! i know that in finnish you have a perfectly gender neutral pronoun hän (and that yall just use se which is just as gender neutral) and it makes me curious. if yall have one pronoun for everybody, do some people use neopronouns in finnish?

Gosh, maybe? This is honestly something I've also thought about so much, I've considered sometimes just making my own neos for purely finnish use but I haven't just gotten to it. I don't doubt there's been others like me with this idea, I know there's at least one Finn who uses Se/sen irl too, purely, as a pronoun.

Personally I'm a big fan of Hän and Se but since our pronoun options are very sparce it'd be fun to come up with new ones. But I'm afraid neopronouns are even less publicly known here than in English speaking countries. I could be wrong (and I hope I am) but if someone were to present themselves with neopronouns and say "Hei address me with these instead", it would not be received very well.

There's also the fact that finnish has tons of grammatical cases. Whereas for English neos only need like Xe/xyr/xerself and so on, in finnish it goes more like Hän/hänen/hänelle/häneltä/häneen... And the list goes on. Of course this isn't an issue if you use nounself pronouns and know how to use that noun's grammatical cases! But the issue that we have with English neopronouns would be even worse bc we finns haven't needed to consider anything other than Hän. Bc it's gender neutral obviously. Although I would say there's definitely a need for more gender neutral language in other regards than pronouns..

The answer is.. It's complicated. I fully admit that I'd personally be a bit stunned to hear finnish neopronouns and would likely struggle with them. I know many Finns struggle with gendered pronouns when learning other languages since it's a new concept. But! It would definitely be fascinating! I'm not opposed to it, despite being very doubtful. I think neopronouns are a beautiful thing and I'd do my best to learn and use them for someone (irl or not) if given the chance.

But as far as I know, no, Finns don't really use them in finnish. When around English circles, like online, sure! But otherwise I can't really say. If any other Finn wants to butt in here and add something they're encouraged and welcome to! Thank you for the fascinating question

[inktheblot]

Tag 10 people you want to get to know better

Tagged by @cinnabuntastic , thank you!!

Relationship status: 4 years with @guesso13 💖💖

Favourite colour: Blue

Favourite food: Impossible question. I live for food and there's not much that I won't eat (a handful of allergies and small dislikes).

Song stuck in your head: Nothing Left to Lose by Mat Kearney.

Last thing you googled: Transformers Earthspark

Time: 2:33 pm

Dream trip: I haven't ever been out of the country (USA), or even to a lot of places in the country, so picking just one dream trip is almost as hard as picking one favorite food. The first thing that comes to mind is going to Scotland with guesso, who loved it when xe got to visit and has said that I definitely need to see it too. I'd also love for us to go on a camping trip together just about anywhere, which is something that we've wanted to do forever but haven't had the opportunity to yet, or to meet up with some more internet friends.

Last book you read: It's honestly been too long since I've actually picked up and read a whole book; most of my reading lately has been fanfic, webcomics, and online essays (and tbh I'm sadly behind on a lot of those as well). I don't remember what the last book I read was, sadly. Soon guesso and I want to start doing a mini book club sort of thing, where we can pick a book out that we want to read (whether that's an old favorite of one of us that the other hasn't read yet, or something that we both haven't read in a good while, or something brand new), and just take it at our own pace and be able to discuss and write about it together. I think it's gonna be really good for us, I'm looking forward to it.

Last book you enjoyed reading: Uhhh how about "last fic I bookmarked"? 😂 That would be "We Are Made of Dreams & Bones", an Owl House fic by @scribefindegil . I also recently pre-ordered the print edition of The Sea in You by Jessi Sheron, one of my favorite webcomics.

Last book you hated reading: See above -- that one's a big ol' 🤷‍♂️ from me. I simply Do Not Remember!

Favourite thing to cook/bake: I also love cooking/baking in general, but I immediately thought of these watercolor cookies which are a super fun baking plus art project. We made them last Christmas and expanded from the snowflake idea to also include ornaments and presents and lots of other designs as well, there's definitely lots of ways you could go with it. And at least for me, known Haver Of Shaky Hands, it was a lot easier than trying to decorate something all over with icing tips, haha.

Favourite craft to do in your spare time: Bead Lizard My Beloved 💚 and other lanyard/keychain creachers as well! It's a fun craft AND stim. I like to draw and other things like that as well, though I'm slow at it.

Most niche dislike: Anyone else not a fan of the peanut butter + jelly combination?

Opinion on circus(es) now and in history: I went to a circus as a little kid a total of one (1) time, and I barely remember it -- I don't think I was too impressed, for whatever reason. Obviously now that I have the awareness I'm against anything that involves the mistreatment of animals for entertainment. I don't really know a whole lot about what circuses these days look like, how they're operated, if conditions have improved, etc. Of course there are also plenty of circus performances that don't involve animals as well; I haven't been to any of those personally, but I would look more favorably on something like that, granted that the human performers are also not being exploited.

Do you have a sense of direction and if not what is the worst way you ever got lost: I think I have a pretty good sense of direction. I've been navigator on quite a few road trips and the only time I can think of that I've gotten lost was wandering off with a couple of friends as a kid.

Tagging: @quetzalpapalotl @andromedaprime @gunupwallflower @lohikaar @mercury-falls @b0wieblue @bitegore @korloniumcrystals @honestlyvan @howtotrainyournana and/or anyone else who wants to! No pressure!

[moonlightserenadeeznutz]

luna for the headcanons thing pls pls pls

Yes!!! I love giving Luna headcanons, so here ya go bestie!

(Read under cut)

Luna Lovegood headcanons

First of all, definitely a trans girl, no doubt about that. She lived in a very open environment and was able to explore her gender identity at a young age. Her mother sewed her dresses to wear, long, flowing garments that Luna thought were the most beautiful things she’d ever seen. Her father taught her how to make flower crowns and crowns of leaves, and she’d wear them with her dresses.

She didn’t have to come out to her parents. Her femininity at a young age simply led to her simply stating that she was a girl, and that her name was Luna. Her parents were very accepting (and Xenophilius is trans himself because fuck you of course he is, so he was super supportive of Luna).

She named herself after the moon because her parents loved astrology and they taught her all the different planets and their moons, and all the different stars in the sky and how to spot the constellations.

The Lovegoods were definitely pagan, I mean they were all about nature and spirituality. They always marked every single holiday, staying up all night on the solstices, lighting huge bonfires, and making wreaths to wear. Pandora played the lyre, Xenophilius sang songs and Luna would act out stories and poems.

Cornish, and they speak the language as well because being bilingual is sexy.

Speaking of pagan, Pandora’s funeral would have also been pagan, obviously.

She’d have a natural burial, and Luna would recite a poem, and the rest of the family would also give eulogies, recite poetry, or thank the Goddess. Four members- including Xenophilius and Luna- would stand at each point on the compass and “invoke” each element (Air in the East, Fire in the South, Water in the West and Earth in the North) and give thanks to them. There would also be music at the wake, played by members of the family. Drums, tambourines, flutes etc. Luna played her mother’s favourite song on her lyre.

When she reached Hogwarts, I don’t think she was drawn to anyone in particular right away, I think she had better relationships with the teachers more than the students. She got on really well with Professor Sprout, and I think Hagrid really liked her too, because they’d talk about all the different magical creatures together, and Luna would tell him about all the creatures her and her father wrote about in the Quibbler.

Academically, she was very smart, and did well in most of her classes, but she didn’t particularly find a lot of them overtly interesting to her, unless she was able to put her own twist to it, which usually she wasn’t. In Potions, she wasn’t able to brew her own stuff, make up recipes, or use a variation of the recipe. Snape was much too strict with her and as a result, she didn’t do very well, which made her more upset than she would let on since she had been really good at potions at home.

She particularly shone in third year, since she was able to take classes more suited to her, like Astrology and Divination. Astrology was her favourite of course, and she’d talk about it all the time with Ginny.

However, in third year she also became particularly interested in DADA, mainly because she formed a strong friendship with Professor Lupin. Remus had been informed that Luna was trans, and since he is as well, they had things in common, and were able to talk about it with each other, Remus sort of taking Luna under his wing a little. They’d sit in his office and drink tea and Luna would give him copies of the Quibbler, which he’d happily read.

Luna was actually the first to figure out that Remus was a werewolf, but she didn’t tell anyone, not even him. She didn’t think it was her secret to share, nor did she think it changed anything. But she did find it fascinating, and read a lot of books on lycanthropy. After Remus had left, Luna told him that she knew and she asked if she could write some articles about it in the Quibbler, to raise awareness, or if he’d like to write any articles. Remus agreed to let her write something, and she wrote a three page article about werewolf inequality (but careful not to mention Remus by name). She did interview him about it, and he said that he was proud of being a werewolf, that it was actually very cool at times, but that it was simply wizarding society that had forced him to be ashamed. She wrote all this down, and it became the most bought copy of the Quibbler, as lots of students at Hogwarts wanted to read it, and they shared it with their friends and parents. So despite Remus not being able to come back to Hogwarts as a teacher, he did receive tons of letters in support of him from parents and students who had read the article and put two and two together.

Friends with Ginny by third year! Luna actually took a while to warm up to Ginny, thinking she was this loud, athletic, snobbish type, but then Luna got to know her and realised that she wasn’t that at all. Ginny was loud, but in a contagious laughter sort of way, and she could be very quiet and calm when she wanted to. She was athletic, but chatted animatedly about Quidditch teams, and Luna couldn’t help but listen. And she wasn’t snobbish, quite the opposite. She was the only person who listened to Luna, and discussed her ideas rather than swat them away impatiently. Luna made Ginny flower crowns, and Ginny stayed up with her all night during solstices. They became very close.

Ginny was the first student at Hogwarts that Luna told about being trans, and Ginny came out to her as being bisexual. And they were very supportive of each other, as well as being great at keeping each other’s secrets. They trusted each other with their lives, and would always stand up for the other. If Luna was getting picked on, Ginny would go feral and start fights. Although she eventually stopped, since it made Luna more upset. So she stuck to just being there for Luna (and maybe slipping a potion into bullies’ morning pumpkin juice that made them cluck like a chicken. But Luna didn’t need to know about that...)

That being said, Luna could get angry too of course. When she heard an older girl make fun of Ginny behind Ginny’s back, Luna wordlessly went up to her turned the girl’s hair blue with a wave of her wand. Ginny laughed her head off when she found out.

It was through Luna’s bond with Ginny, that she realised that she wasn’t interested in either the romantic or sexual side of relationships. At first she assumed that it was because Ginny was a girl, and she may not be attracted to girls, but it got her thinking about boys too, about everyone. And she just didn’t want that sort of relationship with anyone. She loved her platonic relationship with Ginny, and that’s how she wanted all of her relationships to be like.

I feel like she also had a close bond with Neville, and they gave each other plants as birthday gifts.

Projecting a little bit here, but Luna with Maladaptive Daydreaming Disorder, spending hours by herself making up fantasies and constructing worlds in her head, making up new characters, and getting so invested in them that she regularly saw herself as her characters. I feel like this started because of the trauma from losing her mother. She didn’t tell anyone about it, or at least nothing in detail, but she tried to explain it a bit to Ginny, who knew to leave her alone when Luna would sit by herself.

MaD also made Luna a little more detached from her gender identity, especially if she was acting as one of her characters (again I’m projecting here) who were either male or genderless. She still identified as female, but in a much more looser, fluid way, and even experimented with she/they pronouns, which she eventually decided she liked. (If this were set in the modern world, I can also imagine her using neopronouns such as xe/xer or fae/faeself, though in the canon world, she may have also tried out it/its).

Doesn’t know much about the muggle world, but Hermione gave them a copy of Alice In Wonderland which they loved. And if I were to headcanon Luna liking a muggle band/artist they’d probably like anything psychedelic or nature-like, maybe the early stuff of Pink Floyd (yes, Dev, I’m thinking about Atom Heart Mother).

Went travelling after Hogwarts, where she met Rolf Scamander, and they hit it off immediately. Very similar to each other, and soon became close friends. I also headcanon Rolf as aro/ace so their relationship basically became like Luna’s and Ginny’s.

Their house was filled with all sorts of plants and animals. Rooms were lined with trees filled with Bowtruckles, and owls flitted in and out of windows, cats slinking about the place, so many frogs. My god, their house was wonderful.

Adopted Lorcan and Lysander because ffs not everyone has to have a nuclear family jkr 🙄. And parents also don’t have to be romantically or sexually involved with each other either; Luna and Rolf had a good relationship, both wanted to be parents, so they raised the twin boys together. And Lorcan and Lysander had a fantastic childhood, can you imAGINE?!

Godmother of Lily Luna, obviously. And Harry and Ginny’s kids loved going round Luna’s place, so more often than not, the house was filled with not only the entire natural world, but also a bunch of children running about the place.

Oh also, Luna has nymph ancestors. They just do, okay?

[sawyid]

LOST character headcanons

here's a comprehensive list of my pronoun, gender, sexuality, and relationship headcanons for just about all the characters! this post will not have any spoilers.

when i say "with:" and list a BUNCH of people it doesn't necessarily mean that i think they're dating all of those people. by "with" it could mean anywhere from "dating and in love with" to "they banged once" lol. ill elaborate on which is which, tho. keep in mind i think that everyone on the island was definitely VERY sexually active and didn't give a fuck about keeping it a secret. i mean, they were all surviving on a deadly island together— why bother keeping secrets?

alex

she/they trans girl

bisexual

maybe polyamorous?

with: karl 🥺 they love each other so much

amy (goodspeed)

she/they gnc woman

lesbian

polyamorous

with: definitely dated juliet for a while while they had the chance, maybe even started crushing on kate

ana lucia

she/he/they/it gnc woman

lesbian as FUCK

monogamous maybe 🤔⁉️

with: maybe had/has a thing with kate? other than that i don't really know who she's compatible with

ben

he/it nonbinary (masc aligned)

gay aromantic

monogamous

dating john 👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨

bernard

he/him trans man

the only valid straight mf on the show

monogamous

married to rose

boone

he/she gnc man

SO SO SO VERY GAY

polyamorous

with: charlie, hurley, jin, michael, sawyer, sayid. id like to think he's dating all of them. maybe started off as a fwb thing but developed into more than that (looking at sawyer specifically)

cassidy phillips (sawyer's "long con")

she/her trans woman

lesbian

polyamorous

with: her and kate definitely had/have a thing

claire

she/they cis woman

bisexual

polyamorous

with: charlie, desmond, hurley, kate, sun. she's dating all of them! she's probably been ... intimate with desmond a handful of times too because they're both dating charlie. hurley is gay and not attracted to women, but he's definitely been in bed with claire a ton of times considering they're both in love with charlie.

charlie

he/they/pup pupgender trans masc

bisexual

so unbelievably polyamorous

with: oh good god here we go... claire, desmond, hurley, boone, eko, jin, michael, sawyer, aaaaand sayid! he loves them all so so dearly! i think he and sawyer definitely started out as fwb (like boone and sawyer). i just think charlie is very quick to fall head over heels. i love him so much 🥺

charlotte

she/it/they trans woman

lesbian

monogamous

naomi is her girlfriend

daniel (faraday)

he/they nonbinary trans masc

gay

polyamorous

with: desmond, hurley, jin, michael, miles, sawyer, sayid. he and desmond are CLASSIC soulmates. i mean, they literally invented the concept of the constant. they're so deeply in love that it's different from his other boyfriends. i honestly think he's also very quick to develop feelings! he and charlie totally would've been in love.

desmond

he/him gnc man

bisexual

polyamorous

with: claire, charlie, daniel, eko, hurley, jin, michael, miles, penny, richard, sawyer, sayid. i'd say charlie, daniel, and penny are the absolute loves of his life. i feel like everyone else he's definitely slept with on a few occasions at the very least. he and sayid are definitely boyfriends. hurley too <3

dogen

he/they gnc man

gay

monogamous

with: lennon

edward mars (the us marshal)

he/him cis man

straight, but maybe did a little experimenting in college ;)

monogamous

eko

he/they gnc man

bisexual

polyamorous

with: claire, charlie, desmond, hurley, jin, kate, michael, sawyer, sayid. of the people here, he's dating charlie, jin, michael, and sawyer. everyone else he had been intimate with/intimate at the same time as his boyfriends because of mutual partners lol.

ethan rom

he/him cis man

straight aromantic

monogamous

frank (lapidus)

he/him cis man

gay

non monogamous

with: richard :) and he's probably done it with dan, miles, michael, sawyer, and sayid a few times

horace (goodspeed)

he/they trans gener maybe 🤔

gay

polyamorous

with: pierre. sawyer and him for sure dated lol. and i'd imagine hurley, jin, and miles were never too busy to help out ;)

hurley

he/they/xe gnc amab dude

gay

polyamorous

with: boone, claire, charlie, daniel, desmond, eko, jin, michael, miles, sawyer, sayid. now with hurley i do think he was dating or at least crushing on everyone here. he has a lot of intimate experiences with these guys when they get together to have fun with charlie. maybe not eko so much? but idk i still think they'd be cute together. but his soulmates are charlie and miles. hurley is gay and not attracted to women, but he's definitely been in bed with claire a ton of times considering they're both in love with charlie.

jacob

he/him cis man

straight aromantic asexual

jack

i REALLY want to just say cishet, but i don't think that's entiiireellyy true... just cus i hate him doesn't mean i can ignore the truth

he/him cis man

bisexual but the type of mf to call himself "heteroflexible" or "heteroromantic bisexual" lmaoo 💀

monogamous

dating nobody ❤️ live alone and die alone ❤️

jae-young lee (sun's friend/ex boyfriend)

he/him cis man

gay

monogamous

with: that "girl" he went to meet in america was actually a guy and theyre gay lovers ��

jin

he/him cis man

gay

polyamorous

with: boone, charlie, daniel, desmond, eko, horace, hurley, michael, miles, sawyer, sayid. he's just dating everyone here end of story. he and michael are soulmates tho 👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨

juliet

she/they/fae nonbinary (neutral) + gnc

lesbian

polyamorous

with: claire, kate, sun. they're all dating each other :>

karl

he/xe trans boy

bisexual

monogamous methinks 🤔 or maybe would be considered "non monogamous" because i think he'd be totally cool with alex also dating someone else alongside him

with: alex

kate

she/they woman

VERY bisexual

VERY polyamorous

with: claire, juliet, sun, sawyer. dating all of em! fuck jack all my homies hate jack.

lennon

he/him cis man

gay

monogamous

with: dogen

libby

she/they gnc woman

lesbian

monogamous idk

she was very obviously written into the show as the "romantic interest that hurley didn't have" but everything she does is some shit charlie would do. she's like charlie's cis-sona.

locke

he/him trans man

bi with a preference for men

monogamous

dating ben 👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨

man in black

they/he nonbinary masc

pansexual (aromantic)

monogamous

michael

he/him cis man

gay

polyamorous

with: boone, charlie, daniel, desmond, eko, hurley, jin, miles, sawyer, sayid. dating everyone!

mikhail

he/him cis man

gay

monogamous

miles

he/they trans man

bisexual

polyamorous

with: claire, daniel, desmond, horace, hurley, jin, kate, michael, richard, sawyer, sayid. i think of him as charlie 2 in that he is also a whore (/pos). he fucks to survive. BUT he is also in love with all these people. other than horace maybe, that was just a fwb thing. and i don't think he and kate dated but they've definitely fucked considering they're both dating sawyer, same thing with claire

naomi (dorrit)

she/her trans woman

lesbian

monogamous

with: charlotte

nikki

she/they cis woman

straight

monogamous

with: paulo!

nour abbed "nadia" jazeem

she/her cis woman

lesbian

monogamous

paulo

he/him cis man

bisexual

monogamoius

with: nikki

penny

she/her cis woman

bisexual

non monogamous

with: just desmond! but she loves her husband's boyfriends endlessly and has definitely been involved in the bedroom with them sometimes too

pierre

he/him cis man

bisexual

polyamorous

with: horace and lara (chang, miles's mom)

richard

he/they gnc man

gay

non monogamous?

with: he's dating frank and miles, but has also been intimate with desmond, hurley, jin, sawyer, and sayid because of mutual boyfriends.

rose

she/her cis woman

bisexual

monogamous

married to bernard

rousseau

she/her trans woman

lesbian

monogamous

sawyer

he/him cis man

he is also VERY bisexual

also violently polyamorous

with: boone, claire, charlie, daniel, desmond, eko, frank, hurley, jin, kate, michael, miles, richard, sayid. i think the only people here he isn't dating are claire, frank, and richard.

sayid

he/him, maybe he/they, gnc man

gay

polyamorous

with: boone, charlie, daniel, desmond, eko, hurley, jin, michael, miles, richard, sawyer. dating all of them! he's also been intimate with a kate pretty often for reasons that stay between sawyer, kate, and himself <3

sun

she/they trans woman

lesbian

polyamorous

with: claire, juliet, kate. dating all.

tom brennan (kate's childhood boyfriend)

he/him trans man

gay

monogamous

walt

he/they trans masc

he's a kid so im not going to headcanon a solid sexuality as that would be weird lol. some kind of mlm tho

extra: i care about him so much he doesn't get enough attention in the fanbase :( my bb had so much potential and the writers just decided to ignore him :/

shannon

she/her female

heterosexual

monogamous

with: nobody. ever. die. die a painful painful death millions of times over again

THE END !

that shit took forever to type out holy FUCK.

[sleepless-in-starbucks]

All the Reasons I Love You

Ao3

Summary: Virgil wished he could say he didn't believe his mother. Wished he could say he knew her ugly words were also ugly lies and nothing more. But even lies could hold truths, and in this case, Virgil knew hers did- after all, really, who would want to love someone as broken as him? Content: Panic attacks/anxiety, mentally/emotionally abusive parent, mentions of death/dying as jokes (as in no one’s actually dead they just joke that they’re going to be), self-deprecation, self-esteem/self-worth issues, nb!Remy, genderfluid!Logan Pairings: Platonic to romantic Analogical, background romantic Losleep, platonic Sleepxiety, ambiguous future Analosleep

~~

    You’re better than this.

    I know you’re not this weak. Why do you always act like you are?

    No one’s going to want to pick you up if you keep falling apart.

    Virgil slammed his locker shut, leaning his forehead against the cold metal. He and his mom had had another fight the night before, and he couldn’t stop thinking about it.

    Correction: He had had a panic attack and his mother had yelled at his prone and shaking form. She just called it a fight because then it made it look like they were both in the wrong.

    Virgil couldn’t even remember what had caused it- something she had said, probably, but who knows. All he really remembers is not being able to breathe, falling off the couch as he struggled to get through his counting exercises, his mother watching him with open scorn as she belittled him.

    “You’re never going to get a wife like this.” She had said as he choked on his own hurried breaths. “No one’s going to care about you if you’re so useless.”

    It was always about marriage. As if that mattered to Virgil. His mom didn’t even know he was queer- something he had no plans to ever tell her. He had just focused on trying to breath, a task that had become a little easier once his mother had given up with her insults, stalking off to aggressively wash the dishes. As soon as he could stand without the world completely greying out, Virgil had run off to his room, locking himself in and staying there until he had to leave for school the next day.

    “Greetings, Virgil.”

    Virgil turned his head, still pressing the side of his face against the locker even as he looked at the speaker. Logan was as put together as always- their black and midnight blue hair was pulled into a neat braid, and they were wearing a simple NASA t-shirt that was tucked into their clean and un-ripped jeans. Pinned to the dark leather jacket they had on was both their genderfluid pride pin and their ‘they/them pronouns’ pin.

    “Hey, Lo.” He returned, finally moving so that his shoulder was leaned against his locker and not his head. “Remy give you xir jacket?”

    “I stole it.” Logan responded. When Virgil raised an eyebrow at them, Logan sighed. “Fine, yes, xe gave it to me and refused to let me give it back.”

    Virgil chuckled. “I think Remy’d give you the world if you wanted it. Xe’s not going to make you steal xir jacket.”

    Logan smiled, the corner of their mouth tipping up. “Fair enough.” They said happily. Their smile fell in the next moment, however, being replaced by what Virgil was sure was meant to be a neutral expression but instead came out as a very nervous one. “Virgil, I was wondering if you are free after school today?”

    “Um, I am.” Virgil said, frowning in worry. “Why?”

    “I need- want- need to discuss something with you.” Logan said before adding on quickly, “It’s nothing bad, I assure you.”

    “Uh huh.” Virgil said, tone faintly disbelieving. He appreciated that Logan had tried to ease the anxiety they clearly knew would flare at the words ‘I need to discuss something with you’ with the addition, but given how hurriedly they had added it and the fact that their fingers were tapping repeated against their thigh (one of their nervous stims), it hadn’t helped much. “As long as I can get a ride home, I’m free.”

    Logan nodded. “Of course. Meet you in the park?”

    “Works for me.” Virgil responded. Logan nodded again, just as the bell rang.

    “I have to go.” Logan said, as if Virgil didn’t also have to go. “I have chess at lunch, so I won’t see you then- after school, though, I will?”

    “Yeah, you will.” Virgil confirmed.

    “Great.” Logan said, their tapping stopping for a moment as they smiled. “Have a good day, Virgil.” 

    “You too.” Virgil told them as they turned and rushed down the hall, trying to beat the bell to chemistry. Virgil remained at his locker a moment longer, his classroom close enough he wasn’t worried about tardiness, instead allowing his mind to briefly wander and settle upon what he was worried about- his newly set after school meeting.

    ~~

    “I’m going to die.”

    Remy took a long, noisy slurp of xir iced coffee. “No, you’re not.”

    “Yes I am.”

    “No you’re not.”

    “Yes I-”

    “Hun, as fun as this is, I do not need to deal with you getting yourself stuck in an anxiety spiral right now.” Remy interrupted him, now checking xir nails, painted in shades of black and pink, the colour choice having clearly been made to match with xir pink tank top and black jacket. Virgil thought it still worked, even if xe’s jacket was currently being worn by xir partner. “You haven’t even explained why you think today’s your last.”

    Virgil slumped over the table, letting out a groan. “Logan wants to talk to me after school.”

    “So…?”

    “So, they were clearly nervous about it!” Virgil exclaimed, turning his face downwards and pressing it against the table top. “They’re going to kill me.”

    Remy laughed. “No offense, darling, but I don’t think Logan’s much of a killer. Well, killer looks aside. Besides, what do you care? More time with your friend and crush can’t exactly be the worst thing the world-”

    “Crush-!” Virgil jerked back up, eyes wide. “They’re not my crush!”

    Remy titled xir sunglasses down so that xe could stare at Virgil in disappointment. “Sugar, you ain’t subtle.”

    “Yes- but- you’re dating them!” Virgil resorted to, as if Logan being a taken enby made it impossible for Virgil to think they were cute and nice and clever and-

    “I’m poly, they’re poly,” Remy shrugged as xe spoke, pausing to sip xir drink, “I’m not exactly the jealous type… if you’ve got a thing for them, babes, you might as well just admit it.”

    Virgil didn’t respond immediately, but soon enough he was slumping down again, crossing his arms on the table and resting his head on top of them. “Yeah, alright, whatever.”

    Remy smirked. “Now, was that so hard?”

    “Doesn’t change the fact that I’m going to die at that meeting.”

    Remy sighed. “You’re not going to die at that meeting.”

    Virgil glared heatlessly at Remy. “You can’t promise that.”

    “They’re my boo, I’ll make sure they don’t kill ya.” Remy said, pulling xir phone out of xir pocket and checking xir messages. “Hmph.”

    “What is it?”

    “Logan’s reminding me iced coffee doesn’t count as lunch.” Remy said, looking back at Virgil with a mildly exasperated smile. “That nerd won’t let me get away with half my old habits anymore. It’s almost annoying.”

    “Self-care being gently forced upon you by your beloved.” Virgil said, tone dry with sarcasm as he finished, “Yeah, that sounds awful.”

    “Oh, hush.” Remy said, waving xir hand dismissively as xe put xir phone away. “And come on. I’m not letting you get away with ‘I had a big breakfast’ if Logan won’t let me get away with iced coffee.”

    Virgil huffed but he still got up. “Why must you force your partner’s policies upon me?”

    “Because you’re my friend so I want you to practice self-care too, and I don’t want to suffer alone.” Remy said as xe headed for the cafeteria doors, Virgil following xem. “Plus, I figure they’re gonna be both our partner soon enough anyways-”

    “What?!”

    “Oh, uh,” Remy faltered for a moment, glancing back at Virgil, eyes masked by xir sunglasses but xir expression obviously conflicted. It smoothed out after a moment, however, and xe continued confidently, “well, your secret is officially out now, sweetheart. Shouldn’t take me too long to get y’all matched!”

    “I- oh- Remy-” Virgil tripped over his words, biting his tongue as Remy stopped to look at him in confusion. “You don’t have to do that, Rem, really.”

    “Trust me, sugar, it’ll be my pleasure.” Remy assured him, resuming xir walk towards the exit. “Won’t harm either of us if I try, anyways, yeah?”

    Virgil didn’t reply to that, simply continuing to follow Remy in silence. Because it could harm one of them, specifically himself, when he was forced to confront Logan’s reaction- which could range anywhere from awkward pity to outright disgust.

    After all, while his mother certainly had no right to say the things she said, the things she said were still true… and Logan was so capable, so smart and able to take care of themself… well.

Someone like them wouldn’t fall in love with a ball-and-chain.

    ~~

    Virgil was going to die.

    He was standing at the entrance to the park, Logan seated at a picnic table not too far away from where he was hovering. They hadn’t seen him yet, busy scribbling something or another on their paper, but Virgil knew he didn’t have forever to panic.

    So he was taking what time he did have to mega-panic.

    He had briefly considered running away from the whole situation, but Remy was watching him from the street, waiting in the car and playing the role of both waiting chauffeur and watchdog.

    “You’ll do fine, darling.” Remy had assured him, smirking. “Though, if Logan does kill you, I’m obligated by partner code to help them hide your body.”

    That exchange had not put Virgil at ease.

    Virgil wasn’t even close to finishing his several internal panic attacks when he realized Logan had looked up from their work and spotted him. They were waving him over, smiling. Virgil gulped and tried not to wobble as he made his approach.

    “There you are.” Logan greeted, voice warmer than Virgil had expected from them. His ‘stolen’ jacket now bore both their ‘he/him’ and ‘they/them’ pronoun pins. “I was beginning to worry you weren’t coming.”

    “Nah, I wouldn’t do that to you.” Virgil said, trying to hide the tremor in both his voice and hands as he sat down across from Logan. “Just had to stay a bit late in sixth- sorry.”

    “It is perfectly alright. No need to apologize.” Logan assured him as he started pushing their papers into his bag. The quick look at them that Virgil got revealed them to not be the equations he had been expecting to see- instead, it was simply covered in back-and-forth lines and meaningless doodles; distractions, things to focus on instead of whatever had them so worked up.

    So this meeting had Logan stressed too. Great. Super. Utterly fantastic.

    Virgil bit down on the inside of his mouth, trying to keep what little bit of his cool he had left. “So. Something you needed to talk to me about?”

    “Uh- yes.” Logan confirmed, though Virgil didn’t miss his hesitation. They looked away from Virgil, his hand once more on their thigh and tapping out a beat too fast for any song to follow.

    “...Can I know what it is you need to talk to me about?” Virgil asked, really starting to hate this theme of him starting the conversation. He wasn’t good at it normally, and right now he felt he was only doing worse.

    Logan nodded, but didn’t say anything right away. Virgil nodded too, an echo of Logan’s movement, deciding to give Logan their time to respond. A minute or two stretched before Logan took in a deep breath, the tapping on his thigh finally coming to a stop as they turned to Virgil. He smiled, a small nervous thing that immediately had Virgil even more on edge.

    “Virgil,” They started, that one word alone spiking Virgil’s blood pressure, “you are my friend of five years. I have known you since seventh grade. I like to believe that, in the span of time between then and now, we have grown… close.”

    “That’s how friendships work, specs.” Virgil said, trying to beat down the demon of paranoia that had arisen to explain to him that Logan was clearly about to disown him, or perhaps shoot him.

    “I am aware, trust me, I just-” Logan cut himself off, laughing nervously and glancing away for a moment before once more returning their gaze to Virgil, “I’m no good at this.”

    Virgil laughed a bit too, albeit more anxiously than nervously. “And what’s ‘this’?”

    Logan let out a breath. “You are aware that I am dating Remy?”

    “Hard not to be, what with you wearing xir jacket and everything.”

    “And you are aware that I am polyamrous and that we are in an open relationship?”

    Virgil swallowed. “Remy told me earlier today, yeah, though I don’t see why that could be important-”

    “I like you!” Logan exclaimed, suddenly, almost panickedly. “Well, love you, more accurately put, but I hope I get my point across-” Logan itched at the back of their neck, looking sheepish. Virgil, for his part, had been frozen since Logan had said those first three words. “I meant to do this much more… eloquently, but I- well, I’m never good with this. You can ask Remy, I yelled it at xem in the middle of a Starbucks- Virgil? Are you okay?”

    Virgil, to his mixed horror and humiliation, didn’t respond, finding himself still functionally frozen in place. His unresponsive exterior wasn’t a very accurate depiction of his inner turmoil, however- he could feel his heart pounding against his ribcage, his heartbeat drumming in his ear, his lungs constricting and his throat closing up.

    Useless

    Weak

    No one’s going to want you

    Virgil hated that he knew he was only proving the voices right- proving his mother right. But he couldn’t help it. All he could do was choke on nothing and wait for the insults he knew would soon be coming-

    “Virgil!”

    When had Logan gotten so close? Virgil could’ve sworn he was seated across from him, but now they were next to him, and his eyes were really wide, and they looked really worried and that couldn’t be good so why was Logan worried what had him worried-

    “Virgil, I need you to breathe with me.” Logan’s voice was much calmer this time, and Virgil was much more inclined to listen to it. It was reassuring, grounding, familiar.

    He jerked when his hand was touched, but when he realized it was Logan holding his hand, gently guiding it to rest on their chest as he breathed exaggeratedly, he relaxed, trying his hardest to follow Logan’s breaths.

    Virgil wasn’t sure the last time he had come down from a panic attack so quickly. It helped, he thought vaguely, somewhere in the back of his mind, to have someone helping you instead of yelling at you.

    “Virgil?” Logan repeated Virgil’s name once more, this time softly, concern colouring his tone. “Are you okay?”

    “I- yeah.” Virgil said, still feeling breathless. He didn’t try to move from his position, hunched over and leaning towards Logan, the hand Logan had pressed against their chest remaining there. “Sorry.”

    “No need to apologize.” Logan told him easily, lowering his hand from their chest but still holding it, helping to keep Virgil grounded. “If anyone should be apologizing, Virgil, it’s me. I never thought that my confession might- I didn’t think about how your anxiety might cause you to react, and I am so, so sorry for that.”

    Virgil waved him off with his free hand. “Don’t worry about it.” Logan opened their mouth to respond, but Virgil simply waved dismissively once more. “You couldn’t have known, Lo. It’s not your fault.”

    Logan didn’t make any response to that, but Virgil could tell they wanted to. The silence stretched for a moment before Logan began, “If you want to go home now-”

    “Why?”

    Logan shut up the moment Virgil spoke, eyes wide as they looked at him in confusion. “Why what?”

    “Why- why me?” Virgil asked, disliking how weak he sounded but having no way to remedy it. “I mean, you already have Remy, and I-”

    Logan still looked confused. “Why you?” They repeated, perplexed. “Why wouldn’t it be you?”

    Virgil chuckled, but it was harsh yet shaky. “I’m an anxious mess who overthinks everything! I have a panic attack every other week! I had a panic attack when you tried to tell me you loved me! I don’t exactly have that many redeeming qualities- especially when you look to Remy, who’s got confidence, and style, and-”

    Logan’s small smile returned as he squeezed Virgil’s hand, pulling him out of his thoughts. “Virgil, I’m not picking out partners based on objective merit. If I was, I wouldn’t be dating Remy.”

    “Xe’s your partner-”

    “Xe’s sweet and has no braincells.” Logan corrected, still smiling. “But I love xem, because I think xe’s cute, and xe makes me happy- simple as that.”

    Logan was looking at Virgil now, his smile growing as they moved to hold one of Virgil’s hands in both of his own. “Yes, you have anxiety, and yes, you have panic attacks, but that doesn’t nullify all the reasons I love you.”

    “Reasons you… reasons you love me?” Virgil repeated, voice quiet and vulnerable.

    “You’re thoughtful regarding everything you do.” Logan said without preamble. “And you’re respectful towards all. When bored, you doodle band logos on the backs of your hands, and you run your fingers through your hair when you’re stressed. You sing rock songs under your breath when you think no one can hear and your voice is heavenly when you do so. And sometimes you smile without even realizing it, and I- I think you’re prettiest then, because you’re relaxed and you’re happy and you’re absolutely beautiful.”

    Virgil didn’t know how to respond to that outside of gaping at Logan, feeling once more breathless but now in a good way. “Really?” He managed, just barely.

    Logan squeezed Virgil’s hand again, scooting closer to him so that their knees could bump up against each other. “I would never lie to you, Virgil, not about this.”

    Virgil nodded, more to himself than Logan. “Okay.” He said, quietly.

    “Pardon?”

    “Okay.” Virgil repeated, this time louder, before he allowed himself to slump fully forwards, head falling upon Logan’s shoulder, exhaustion from the panic attack and the sudden need to be much closer to Logan mingling together and pushing him forwards. Logan reacted immediately, releasing Virgil’s hand to wrap their arms around him instead, holding him close but not too tightly.

    “So…” Logan started, uncertainly, though not as nervous as they had been when Virgil first arrived in the park. “If I asked you to be my boyfriend… what would you say?”

    “Yes.” Virgil replied without a thought, the answer already long decided. “I’d- I’d love to be your boyfriend.”

    Almost as soon as he had said that, Virgil could feel Logan pressing a kiss to his head, gentle and sweet. “Good. Because I’d love to be your partner.”

    Virgil pressed himself closer to Logan, head still pressed into his shoulder. “Lo?”

    “Yes, my love?”

    A giddy little smile appeared on Virgil’s lips at the petname. “I love you.”

    Logan chuckled at that, also sounding rather giddy themself, choosing to press another kiss to Virgil’s head. “I love you too.”

    Virgil knew the moment wouldn’t last forever. Soon enough, he’d be once more asking if this was possible and deciding it was not, doubting Logan and their love and falling back into the familiarity of his mother’s words.

    But Logan would be there when that happened, just like he was now, to hold Virgil and remind him of the truth- to love him. Because Virgil knew that this wasn’t perfect. But he also knew that it was real.

    And that was enough.